Wow. It sure is quiet.

Today is the first day of school. Everyone has been sent off or dropped off and now here I am at home. Alone. No little people asking for a snack. No bottoms to wipe. No Noggin to turn on. Just quiet. Really really quiet.

I've had someone home with me for 11 years. I'm a mom. That's what I do. And now someone else is taking care of my kids during the day. I don't really like it.

Marleigh started middle school. She was excited and nervous and just a ball of energy this morning. She says she's so happy to be out of elementary school because she was, "like, sooo over that". She's definitely turning into a little teenager.

Elliot has a teacher that is new to the school this year. We met her last night and she seems very nice. She was just married 3 weeks ago, and as far as I know she's not taught before. Heaven help her. She's got a lot of little boys in that 4th grade class. I told Elliot to be extra good today. Don't want her to get scared off her first day.

Sela got the one teacher for Kindergarten that I didn't want her to get. While I'm sure this teacher will be fine, she's not the lovey-dovey type that I believe a Kindergarten teacher should be. And of all my kids, I think Sela needs that the most. The parents were supposed to stay with the kids this morning. So I went. The classroom was full of children playing and talking to each other and parents sitting at tiny little tables watching the kids. Then there was me, with Sela attached to me like a peel to a banana. I tried several times, unsuccessfully to peel her off and get her to play. She even knows kids in the class, but she just wouldn't leave my side. Eventually all but two parents (myself and one other) left and the kids headed out to play. Sela again wouldn't leave my side. The teacher finally came over and tried to coax her out onto the playground and I took it as my cue to leave. When I announced that I was going to head out Sela burst into tears. I finally peeled her off of me and transferred her over to the teacher. I made my way across the playground and looked back to see that she was still attached to the teacher. I had a ways to walk to get to my car where I got in and cried a bit at the thought of leaving my kids all in school and knowing that I'd come home to an empty quiet house. Then I drove around the front of the school in hopes that by now I would see Sela playing on the swings or talking with her friends. Instead, there she was still stuck like glue to the teacher. I hope she does ok. I hope the teacher makes her feel better.

Tess has been saying she didn't want to go to school because she didn't want me to be all alone. Bless that little girl. I took her in to Pre-K today and anticipated that she would act the way Sela did. Instead she sat down at a table and got hard at work doing puzzles. My baby, at school, doing just fine. Without me.

It's just strange. I wish I could freeze them all and not let them grow up anymore. I'm not ready for them to get big.

In other news, Hubby wants me to get a job. We could really use the extra income and we started talking about it a few weeks ago after he looked at our bills. At that point, we discussed that maybe when Tess enters 1st grade I could find a full time job. Then the next week Hubby looked at our bills and budget a little closer and things have just snowballed since then. There happens to be a full time job available that would be a lifesaver financially. But it's full time. And I'm dealing with my kids all being in school and now all of the sudden there is the possibility that I might not even be here for them on sick days and before and after school. Not to mention the summer. I decided that I would just apply and see what happens. I think the chances of me getting the position are slim and if I get it then I'll take it as a sign that it was meant to be. Except that the job is with a city office, which is where Hubby works, so he seems to be putting feelers out and thinks I might actually have a shot of getting it. It's one thing to just get it on my own and know that it was meant to be. It's another thing to have Hubby doing what he can to improve my chances of getting it. Then maybe it wasn't meant to be. Right?

I guess right now I'll just deal with the house being as quiet as it is. I'll worry about this job situation when and if they call me for an interview.